Dear Coaches Corner

Don Cherry: That was sickening last week, by the way,

Ron Mclane: What? What is going on with you?

DC: Ah, all that shi- what, we're hockey night in Canada, what are we doing talking about saving the world, and all this stuff, let's talk hockey

RM: Wha-Well that's the whole idea behind December 25th

DC: Ha, let's talk about some good guys

RM: Ok,
DC: Let's talk about the Troops

Dear Ron McLane. Dear Coach's Corner.
I'm writing in order for someone to explain
to my niece the distinction between
these mandatory pre-game group rites of submission
and the rallies at Nuremberg.
Specifically the function the ritual serves
in conjunction with what everybody knows is,
in the end, a kid's game.
I'm just appealing to your sense of fair play
when I say she's puzzled by this incessant pressure
for her to not defy collective will and yellow ribboned lapels,
as the soldiers inexplicably repel down from the arena rafters.
Which, if it not so insane,
they'll be grounds for screaming laughter.

Dear Ron McLane, I wouldn't bother with these questions
if I didn't sense some spiritual connection.
We may not be the same, but it's not like we're from different planets.
We both love this game so much we can hardly fucking stand it.
Alberta-born, and Prairie-raised.
It seems like there ain't a sheet of ice north of Fargo I ain't played.
From Penhold to the Gatinaeu, every fond memory of childhood
that I know is somehow connected to the culture of this game.
I just can't let it go.

I guess it comes down to what kind of world you want to live in.
And if diversity is disagreement, disagreement is treason.
Well, you'll be surprised if we find ourselves
reaping a strange and bitter fruit that that sad old man beside you
keeps feeding to young minds as virtue.
It takes a village to raise a child, but just a flag to raze the children
till they're nothing more than ballasts for fulfilling
a madman's dream of a paradise. Complexity reduced to black and white.
How do I protect her from this cult of death?